Subway Ad of the Week

Suddenly I want a Gatoraide.

Queen!

Green!

Get Painted! Everyone's Doing It!

Body Art

Flags!

My Every Dream Come True

I am utterly beside myself with how totally freakin' hawt GuysWithiPhones.com is. Nerdgasm! (Not safe for work. Duh.)

I Want To Be This Gay

Do You Fear Being Raped By A Huge Rodent?

Well apparently you should....



If you prefer your soft porn with a smidge less rats and sexual assault, try the Just Teasing Gallery over at Model Mayhem, my new favorite web site.







Oh ... they have girls, too. You'll have to find them on your own. I can't be bothered.

All The News That's Fit To Print

The New York Times is getting into the gun-toting, gay, twink soft porn business. Awesome.



I swear I didn't Photoshop this. Really.
It was on the NYTimes home page. Really.

"Available At Bloomingdales"

I'm so glad to finally see Bloomingdales getting into the rent boy business.

One of these things is just like the other

On the right is Nate, my friend Seth's fiance. On the left is Daniel, a friend Seth invited to visit them in NYC.



Does anyone else find the fact these two guys look nearly identical suspicious?



Whatever, boys, you're adorable. I guess we'll let it slide. But don't think we're not on to you, Seth.

Join Me Sunday Night for a Free Dance Performance and Poi Afterward

Sunday night, weather permitting, I'm going to see Los Vivancos perform free in Battery Park.





This fabulous free show is sponsored by The Joyce Theater. For more info and to make sure it's not rained out check this calendar.

The show is at 7:30pm.
I'll arrive around 6:30pm to stake out a spot. (map)
Contact me if you'd like to join my dinner group at 5:00pm.
Poi will be spun afterward.
There will likely be other silliness.

If we absolutely must have a new 90210 ...

... may we please have an actual gay character this time instead of one that's just "confused"?

No Fair! Mom! Make Him Stop!

Mario Lopez made fellow Chorus Line cast member Nick Adams put on a baggy sweatshirt because he's upset that Nick's biceps are bigger.



Mario Lopez is a whiny little bitch.



Fucking little brat.



Whatever. I'd still do him.

Yup, Can't Do That Either

You can add this pose of a Desir gymnast warming up to the 300 other things I saw this weekend that I will never be able to do.

The Physicality of Performance

This weekend I saw Desir, an erotic, adult circus of acrobats and gymnasts. It plays at Spiegel World, the wonderful German-style, performance-art circus tent at the South Street Seaport.



And I finally saw Naked Boys Singing, the all dancing, all singing, all naked musical that has run in New York City for 10 years.


The sex appeal of these shows is obvious. But after the titillation of fit bodies stripped bare waned I noticed something else entirely ... the physicality of performance.

Singing, dancing and even just speaking in a stage voice all require quite a lot of physical exertion. The signs of this exertion, however, are usually concealed by costumes and makeup. Watching the performers in these two shows and the athletes in the Olympics I've been fascinated by how the body moves and works to achieve these feats.

Singers' diaphragms rise and fall. Gymnasts' muscles become taught and ropey revealing the fibers. Dancers' and swimmers' expanding and contracting chests reveal their huge lung capacity and voracious need of oxygen.

But even the subtle signs are interesting, the tense of abdominals needed to project a voice in a theater, the sheen of sweat on a chest or a small of the back, and the little flourishes of movement used to maintain balance. By the end of his Naked Boy Singing solo song and dance number, one of the actor's whole body flushed the most adorable shade of pink.

From now on when I go to the theater, I'll be picturing the performers naked ... and not for my usual reasons.

One of these things is not like the others

Since when do we let white guys into our city's roving bands of break-dancing acrobats?



In 16 years in New York City, I have never once seen a white guy in one of these troupes. I stopped to watch figuring, "These Latin and black boys all have fantastic rhythm. If they let in a white guy, he must be awesome." He wasn't. He sucked. He wasn't even trying. He looked like a bored backup singer for a crappy lounge act.

So very, very confused.

Hi-Def Olympics Pics

You're welcome.

It Came From Craigslist

If you enjoyed,

"Want it from behind while you play Super Mario Brothers?"

Then you'll love,

"Guide to Gay Personals Ads"

and

"My roommate is obese and I am looking to have an intervention."

You're welcome.

Does This Lipgloss Make Me Taste Gay?

Casual Athletic Nudity

Swimmers like Greg Louganis and Michael Phelps seem so comfortable showing their bodies to the world. Asked about it, athletes usually say something simple like, "that's the uniform."



I never understood this unselfconscious until I started spinning poi. If I leave my shirt on, it will just get sweaty and gross. So I take it off. It's not so much I'm dying to show my fuzzy navel to the world. It's just the uniform.

While poi has made me more confident about my body, an underwear model I ain't. But I'm feeling much less of an all-knees-and-elbows, gangly, awkward nerd these day. Thanks, poi.



At the Olympics, ancient Greeks would perform completely nude. But there was one taboo. It was considered indecent to show the glans of the penis. So to prevent it from accidentally slipping out, athletes would tie a kynodesme, a small string, around their foreskins, ensuring it would stay inside.

Hot Sculpture on Sculpture Action

There are a striking number of man on man sculptures in Florence with a strong domination theme. I gotta say, it's pretty hot.












Art historians wonder if the man on the bottom of this Michelangelo sculpture is a self-portrait of the artist.



Hmmmm ... let's see ... a guy with a beard with a hot young man on top of him.
Yeah, my money says that's Michelangelo.

David Mania, Delicious and Disasterous

There so much more to be said about David. But I wanted to separate the sincere from the sarcastic. Ready for a huge helping of tragic and tacky? Here we go....

There is entertainment to be had while viewing the David. The slightly uncomfortable looks on the American frat boys' faces betray their delicious inner turmoil. "Dude, I'm being told to look at a naked man as an object of beauty. I don't know how to cope with this."

It seems other people are curious about the model as well. Here's a fascinating bit of visual speculation about David.

The whole city of Florence is in the grip of David Mania. Now, when I say the whole city, really I mean tourists and the vendors who sell them crap. I'm sure the locals wouldn't touch this stuff any more than I would.

Some of it is done with a certain charm and affection. David Reloaded by Maria Paola Pozzoli offers many reinterpretations of David.

CARTIER DAVID


DISCO DAVIDS


DEVIL AND ANGEL DAVIDS


GAY PRIDE DAVID


and my favorite ...

ROCKY HORROR DAVID


Remember Mel Brooks' merchandising pitch? "Spaceballs the T-Shirt, Spaceballs the Coloring Book, Spaceballs the Lunchbox, Spaceballs: the Breakfast Cereal and Spaceballs: the Flame Thrower"

It seems the world's most famous set of cock and balls needed this treatment. And since the official museum gift shop is not inclined to serve this crass market, Florence street vendors offer David's not-so privates on everything.

DAVID'S JUNK THE APRON


DAVID'S JUNK THE POSTCARD


DAVID'S JUNK THE PUZZLE


DAVID'S JUNK THE POSTCARD WITH SUNGLASSES


There's really no end to it. It's pretty horrifying but I have to admit there's a little part of me that likes it. Florence may well be the only city in the world where man parts are proudly displayed on every street corner. That's awesome.